The Missing War

(Cronan Thompson)

From:         "Plain and Simple Cronan" <>
Subject:      The Missing War...
Date:         27 Mar 1998 00:00:00 GMT
Message-ID:   <6fgqm6$>
Organization: Wierd
Newsgroups:   alt.religion.kibology,,,

Matthew Murray wrote
>> Please note that just because some episodes aren't focused on the war,
>> this does NOT mean that the writers are overlooking it altogether.
> But the point is, even if the story does not focus on the war, the
> war should still be going on.

The war is still going on. It's just hiding.


You just missed. See you gotta be faster Matt. The war is like... you
know those little bugs that roll into balls when you touch them with
your penis? Well it's like that. Only without the bug.

>Just because it isn't the main focus of the
>story doesn't mean it's not happening.  Big Events like that impact people
>in lots of little ways even when something more personally important is
>going on.

Matt, what you don't realize is that sex and violence are like hohos
and cheesy poofs. Everyone has them within themselves but not
everyone can get them out without medication. It's a simple fact. Live
with it.

>This is my main gripe with the way the war is handled--with the 
>exception of the episodes that are focused entirely on the war, you would
>never know there >is< a war going on.  I think that is a very poor method
>of handling the war.

HA! I was there when the shit hit the fan in Vietnam. I was there
man. We ran ops deep into Canada. WE were elite man. We knew
how to kill Charlie even when he was disguised as an evil
Quebecer. We were that good. I know how to run a friggin war you
silly bastard and I'm telling you that ignoring it is the best way to win.

>> "In the Pale Moonlight" is an example of an episode where the war will be
>> featured prominently.  The Romulans join the war in this episode.
> Yeah, so?  That's not what we're talking about.  We're talking
>about all the other episodes that don't focus on the war, and therefore
>don't show it at >all<.

That's because it's been hiding you silly boy. Probably in Iraq.
Saddam Hussein has long since made clear his aim to conquer the
Federation. This is after he has a working toilet in every home. And
pigs. He hates those. 

>> The Dominion War is one of *many* plot threads on the show. DS9 isn't
>> *just* about the war.
> Okay, whatever.  My only point is that I want to see the effects
>of the war on the characters even when the episode as a whole isn't about

You are seeing the effects of the war. Or, more accurately, people
ignoring it. Notice how big Leeta's breasts are? Well it's hiding there.
And I bet you thought it was silicone. Silly.

>I want to see less officers on the station because they are out 
>fighting, or more soldiers being passed through to fight, or more ships
>docked as they go off to fight, or people being worried about the friends
>or family that are taking part in it...  Stuff like that.

I don't. I want the war to hide in more people's genitalia. I want it to
hide behind Sisko's head. And why not hide on B5? Would you look
for a Federation war on Babylon 5? I wouldn't.

>Stuff that
>makes the war >real< and brings it close to home.  As it is, it is very
>difficult to get personally involved in the war, because it doesn't
>permeate every part of these characters' lives.

You're just being unreasonable. I bet that if the war started hiding in
your ass it would be pretty close to home.

>No matter what else may
>be going on, the threat of the war, and its importance should never

Unless it hides in Bill Clinton's pants. Then the entire nation will be
interested. And Kenneth Starr.. And the vast right wing conspiracy.
That's alot of people. The ratings'll go through the roof !!1!

Kick ass.

>That it does >so< consistently makes me feel very strongly it has 
>as little importance to the characters as it does to the writers.

Writers? You mean it's not real? Next thing you'll be telling me is that
MacGyver can't build a space station using a toothpick and small
Latin American grandmother of 4 beautiful DVD players.

...I once killed a man with a 3.5in floppy

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