Cronan Opens a Can of Fresh Whoop Ass

(from the late Star Trek: Phoenix RPG)

YOU ARE IN SPACE: [ARRRRRRRRRFFFFGGGGGGHHHHHHH] You die of asphyxiation. The Pocket Shuttlecraft pulls up behind the Vorzakk and begins to make lewd motions.

Norman: Let Cronan go or I will show you a real docking manuever.

Terminal: No. He hit me.

Coren: [looks proud] and I shot him....

Norman: You leave me no choice. I installing Internet Explorer 12.01a into all your stations.


Coren: How could you?

Norman: I am an evil elf.... DUH

Cronan: Norman, open the can of whoop ass.

Norman: That's going a bit too far don't ya think?

Terminal: How the hell did he get on a comlink? [looks at his display] What the hell?!?! Everything on that deck has gone blank

Redshirt in yellow: Sir the PS has disappeared!!!

Coren: It has apparently e-mailed itself to our shuttlebay and is introducing Netscape Navigator 19.0g.

Terminal: But Navigator kicks ass....

Coren: But when it meets up with Explorer...

Terminal: ....Dear lord!

Cronan: [over the comlink] That whoop ass is mighty fresh.

IN SPACE: The PS e-mails itself back outside and takes off at high warp, but as the Vorzakk prepares to follow, IE asks for a Security Certificate while Netscape tries to undo all the evils done by IE.


Coren: Who?

Terminal: Sorry.


Norman: [who is on Cronan's shoulder] Cool wasn't I?

Cronan: You were ice.

Norman: Are you praising me?

Cronan: Yes.

Norman: Allright... what did they do to you?

Cronan: Nothing, I have just decided that I like you... and you saved my life.

Norman: I hope you don't think I'll do it again.

Cronan: You will...

Norman: Why do you say that?

Cronan: Because between us, nothing in the galaxy can FLOSS WITH PUDDING!

Norman: Wow! That made sense..... You are improving..

[I am fugitive from the law.... and good sense]

Plain & Simple Cronan
"SWEEEEEET" - Eric Cartman

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